JOKES or FUNNY STORIES

Almost Anything Goes

Postby Luc » Mon Apr 21, 2003 4:04 pm

had to think for a while on that one.. heh..

what do you have when your holding two green balls firmly?

a good grip on the jolly green giant

what has 100 teeth and bites weeners..?

a zipper.. :P or a pissed off wife.. O.o i mean. um .yeah ..i go now
"The error of youth is to believe that intelligence is a substitute for experience, while the error of age is to believe experience is a substitute for intelligence." - Lyman Bryson
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Postby Dreamer » Wed Apr 30, 2003 3:51 pm

I saw my friend Mark the other day. Seems like
every week he gets closer and closer to looking like a cue ball.
When I saw him I said, "Hey, Mark, I think you should quit
denying it, sport. You're going bald."

He bristled and replied, "I'm NOT 'going bald.' I'm getting
'more head.'"
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Postby Luc » Wed Apr 30, 2003 4:13 pm

a young boy walked into the kitchen and asked his mother, is it true that people can be taken apart like machines?

of course not, where did you hear something like that? his mother replied.

the young boy answered, "well the other day, daddy was talking to someone on the phone and he said that he screwed the ass off his secretary"

why were men given larger brains than dogs?

so that they wouldnt hump women's legs at cocktail parties
"The error of youth is to believe that intelligence is a substitute for experience, while the error of age is to believe experience is a substitute for intelligence." - Lyman Bryson
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Postby Ghost » Wed Apr 30, 2003 7:13 pm

A blonde a brunette and a red head were in the waiting room of a hospital talking about pregnancy. The brunette said,"If you want a boy, be on top while concieving. That's how I got my son." The red head said,"Well, if you want a girl, then be on your back while concieving. That's how I got my girl." All of a sudden the blonde starts crying both girls ask her what's wrong and the blonde replies,"I'm going to have puppies!"

It might take people a while to get this I know it took me a minute. :mrgreen:
Better to be hated for who you are than loved for who you're not. - Phlogiston Verdigris
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Postby Luc » Wed Apr 30, 2003 9:04 pm

lol.. haha i got it right away.. doggy style.. haha


two cows were standing next to each other in a field, one cow said, "i was artificially inseminated this morning" the other said" i dont belive you" the first cow said "its true, no bull"
"The error of youth is to believe that intelligence is a substitute for experience, while the error of age is to believe experience is a substitute for intelligence." - Lyman Bryson
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Postby rubydragon » Fri May 02, 2003 5:07 am

Yea well I went to place a joke, it wasn't as sexual as some of these (which are very funny) and the web security won't let me. No I'm fed up!!
The only true source of inspiration, is to be an inspiration.

There is No More Inspiration!!
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Postby Dreamer » Sat May 03, 2003 3:59 am

Ruby get that computer fixed.. whats wrong with it anyway?
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Postby rubydragon » Tue May 06, 2003 8:33 am

I was fooling around, and it blew up, it was kinda funny and annoying at the same time.
The only true source of inspiration, is to be an inspiration.

There is No More Inspiration!!
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Postby Dreamer » Tue May 06, 2003 3:49 pm

what part blew up?
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Postby rubydragon » Wed May 07, 2003 5:43 am

All of it, you really do not want to know what I was doing. First it was the hard drive and all the motherboard then the monitor I wasn't using at the time but lets just say my room was in a mess and there was quite a bit of fire damage.
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