by Dreamer » Mon Mar 24, 2003 11:59 pm
> Earlier in the day, MSNBC broadcasted a brief exchange between on of their
> anchors and the Iraqi ambassador. The guy was a blubbering idiot trying to
> spin what was happening to his country and to proclaim their innocence.
I love that guy. Every time he's on "Meet The Press" is televised comedy
gold. The exchanges usually go something like this:
Tim Russert: Mr. Ambassador. You have stated many times that Saddam
Hussein does not have a mustache. Is this correct?
Iraqui Ambassador: Yes, that is true. We destroyed all mustaches in
1992.
TR: Then why is it every picture we see of him, he has a mustache?
IA: Who?
TR: Saddam Hussein.
IA: Ah yes. The president. Yes, he destroyed his mustache in 1992.
TR: But we have a picture of him, taken just last week, showing him with a
mustache.
IA: Obviously that is an old picture from 1990 or earlier.
TR: Mr. Ambassador, this picture was tkaen just last week. He's holding a
copy of last Friday's newspaper.
IA: Yes. The Basra Bugle. Very good newspaper - wonderful comics
section, "Hi and Lois" just kills me.
TR: And you see the date on the newspaper.
IA: Yes. It is last Friday.
TR: So you agree that this is a recent photograph.
IA: Yes, that is what I said. Last Friday.
TR: And he has a mustache in that photo.
IA: Of course not, I don't know what you are talking about. We destroyed
all mustaches in 1992. Including President Hussein's mustache.
TR: But you can see the mustache right there in the photo.
IA: Where?
TR: On his lip.
IA: His what?
TR: His lip.
IA: Ah yes. His lip. I see no mustache on his lip.
TR: Then why is his upper lip all black and hairy?
IA: Oooohhh...his upper lip. Well that's different.
TR: So you admit that Saddam Hussein has a mustache on his upper lip?
IA: You must be mistaken, he has no mustache. We destroyed all of them
in...
TR: ...1992. Yes, you've said that a number of times. However, this
photo clearly shows Saddam Hussein with a black, hairy upper lip. What is
that, if not a mustache?
IA: Well, obviously it is a shadow. President Hussein was smiling when
the photograph was taken, because he is a kind, happy man, and he is
beloved by all the Iraqi people.
TR: Mister Ambassador, he is clearly not smiling in this photograph, and
there are no shadows on his face. They were eliminated by the camera's
flash. Besides, his lip is not just black, it is also hairy.
IA: Perhaps it is some hummus?
TR: Hummus?
IA: Or a Zionist propaganda photograph. For we have destroyed all
mustaches in 1992.
TR: <sigh> Thank you for coming on our show Mr. Ambassador. Up next, we
have George Will who will whine about something for 7 minutes, then we'll
be joined by that wacky couple, James Carville and Mary Matlin. Right
here on Meet The Press.
William D. "Scriptwriter to the stars" Neumann