The Suitcase
13 September, 2006
Author: Emma-Louise
Kevin couldn’t help but chuckle to himself as strangers passed him on the street, if only they knew. The heavy, odourous suitcase was tugging at his arm almost as though she was still here. Her last words haunted him, forcing the sweat from the back of his neck to trickle just that little bit faster. As he concentrated on putting one foot in front of the other he realised he could still feel her under his fingertips and her taste stained his lips. |
------- Author's Notes -------
I love this. Sorry, I'm all like big-headed by saying this.. but I do really like it. Sorry about the title, I know it's SO imaginative. Got any better ideas? Oh and I know the paragraphs aren't right and there should be more paragraphs and whatnot, but it's because I like the singling out certain lines and I had to do the paragraphs like that otherwise it looked weird. Thanks, comments pls. |
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Comments on this poem/writing:
Mike (82.35.72.145) -- Thursday, September 14 2006, 09:32 pm Lol, this actually quite confused me. Explain please 0=) |
Meridian (71.241.15.210) -- Thursday, September 14 2006, 10:00 pm Emma! Sweet poem! This poem sounds like Kevin incinerated or murdered a woman and is either carrying her possessions or part of her body parts in a suitcase for it to weigh that much. Kevin is stricken with fear while contemplating on where to dispose of the body. Am I anywhere close Emma! All in all, wonderfully written! Just like an author, a journalist! |
Tarna (75.17.200.64) -- Friday, September 15 2006, 01:18 am I like the writing.. leaves you wondering what he is carrying.. sometimes it is best left for the imagination to think about rather than know. Leaving the truth to the interpretation of the reader.. Good writing.. even with the structural flaws.. I enjoyed it.. |
Emma (86.5.165.68) -- Friday, September 15 2006, 08:08 pm Thanks guys. And yes, Meridian, you are right. He is carrying her body parts in his suitcase after being bullied for so long. I'm glad you both enjoyed reading it. I enjoyed writing it! Just kinda makes you wonder where he's gonna take her.. 'where she belongs'.. even I don't know! Thanks again. |
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