I yearned for so long to have a choice.
To be able to speak up and have a voice.
To scream out loud "I love my mom!"
No matter the past life will go on.
I didn't understand what was so wrong?
Why was I kept away for so long?
She can't be as bad as they all say?
What was the reason she went far away?
All I wanted to do was play.
And I prayed she would come back someday.
But instead she chose to continue to stray.
Birthdays came and Christmas too.
Her name was Francis that's all I knew.
The years passed and my curiosity grew.
I was told she didn't care could it be true?
It was obvious something drew us apart.
Did she think I was stupid or not very smart?
I began to realize she had no heart.
She only cared for herself from the very start.
Was this how my life would remain?
With this emptiness and ongoing pain?
With thousands of questions slowly driving me insane?
And if she did show up what would I gain?
I had all these feelings bottled inside.
I felt like my life was an emotional ride.
All I wanted was a mother in who I could confide.
Or memories of her watching me go down the slide.
Or helping me become a strong woman of pride.
Instead I got nothing not even a card.
Unconditional love would that be so hard?
To stop being so stubborn and let down her guard.
And realize her children will forever be scarred?
I've pondered for years what the future will hold.
Would I finally confess or leave it untold?
And if so would she continue to be cold?
Or finally realize she means more to me than gold.
Only God will know how the saga will unfold!!!

------- Author's Notes -------

Tweet

Comments on this poem/writing:

Click here to read other Poems by Marcia Gonzalez

Copyright©2021-1999 by Rebecca R. Hammack

COPYRIGHT NOTICE: All Rights Reserved.   No part of this website, including all pictures and written words,  may be reproduced or copied in any manner from this website without  permission of the original author of the work.  All poetry and pictures herein remain the sole property of the original author and/or copyright owner.  All poetry on this website has been submitted by the original author of the work. To contact any author of the work please e-mail: dreamer@dreamersreality.com  so the proper person may be notified.