I guess it could have been worse, I could have awoken in a room under a bright light with no legs in mass confusion, but instead I woke up with a headache from the night before, nothing more. Slowly glancing around the room I stumble upon a thought, one I thought I had buried a long time ago. One I prayed I would someday forget. It was a smile, and her eyes lit up like a field at moonlight. F*ck, I haven't had this thought in so long, even stranger, it seemed as if I missed the point. Almost like the rest of the world was moving and I was silent, standing still. Now lost in a thought so deep I had to confront it, I wondered if things could have been different. With each thought, each memory seemed to increase my curiosity, then soon my curiosity became my greatest agony. Piece by piece the puzzle became more and more complicated. The answers I thought were the truth soon became less and less dependable. But the guilt that emerges if far greater than the fact that she was broken. So much I wanted to say, but in fact, so few words were exchanged. Loosing sight of how long it's been since her voice was so lovely on the other line, and almost out of desperation, I asked myself if it was worth it, but I already know the answer to the question, she was worth far more.

She couldn't talk that day on account of the eyes in the room. I walked in only to say goodbye, but finding the words was greater than I had expected. Though she tried to fight it I swear for just a moment she would have left. As I stood in the center of the room, the strong man we knew began to crumble inside. Under my breath I begged, but in the end, he won, and I walked away. For so long I wondered each day if she thought of us. If her memories were as fond as mine. I guess love has a way of changing you. When all is said and done, the damage can be more than we had hoped. Sometimes an irreversible wound stays with you even though so much time has passed. And you never forget.

So now I ask, did we loose it all? Did the best moments pass? Are they gone, the moments? If you asked me what I the greatest part was, it was the touch. The one I loved. The one that went deeper than just a graze of her hand. With each fingertip sinking through my skin, into my blood and crashing into my heart, I was poisoned. And she was the cause. One brush of her love, was far greater that a lifetime of regret. And the kiss, the clumsy kiss, for one moment, she was mine.