When The End Comes by Dreamer

When The End Comes
16 February, 2010
author: Rebecca Ditch-Hammack (aka Dreamer)

I wake in the morning and cover my head
I don't even want to move out of my bed
I skip breakfast cause I don't want to eat
Just getting moving everyday is a feat

My life has changed or have I just opened my eyes
I need more and am tired of my own self-lies
I don't feel loved nor do I feel any worth
Maybe it has been my destiny to feel this since birth

I want more, and need more than he is willing to give
I need to feel worthy and appreciated to continue to live
How hard can it be to give out some praise
For some of the work I've done through the days

It's not much to ask and I'm tired of asking
Ignoring my feelings that I continue masking
How to say goodbye when it's really no ones fault
Knowing to him it will be a personal assault

I can't go on suffering this unhappiness
But to give it all up, to move from the abyss
It's not that I don't love him, in so many ways I do
But I gave it my all; I only wish he did too

Now the balls in my court and I am not sure what I want
And I know that no decision can be made nonchalant
Do I just stay and continue to live what I know
Or pack my bags, try to apologize, and just go

I'd miss what I have but it can all be replaced
Leaving it all behind is a truth I have faced
But what if I'm wrong and this is a big mistake
What if this is all some sort of mid-life quake

My feelings are mixed 20 years now behind me
Do I give it all up on a chance of love being set free
And what will happen if my dreams don't pan out
I will have to spend the rest of my life doing without

For now things are cushy and the future is set
If I am wrong I'll live out my life with regret
Maybe I should let the feeling go and quickly dismiss this
In case this is just some sort of a mid-life psychosis

life goes on and then one day you open your eyes and you think is this all there is,
and wonder if maybe is isn't

Colin (69.157.4.80) -- Tuesday, February 16 2010, 07:31 pm

..I wonder that .......
...I wonder that .... everyday!!!
But one thing I am sure about - is how much I love to write at DREAMERS REALITY!

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