Do you remember
all the chances you missed…
the moments you passed by…
the times you just weren’t sure…
when you were confused,
and not knowing how to go about
what you really wanted to do…
That kiss you wanted to share,
her fingers that she casually ran through your hair…
the eyes that you couldn’t read,
the frustration because everyone
seemed that they had to play those damn mind games,
no one could just say what they were feeling
or thinking…
There were rules that had to be followed.
We could be honest with ourselves,
with our close friends,
but never with those it meant the most about.
That’s what hurt the most.
The lies, the way things were,
The way things had to be,
because.
Just because.
Maybe it’s because I’m older than I was,
but I recall, with sadness,
all the times, the moments, the thoughts,
the opportunities…
to be happy,
to be honest with that person,
that one special person…
We hid behind the walls we built,
but they didn’t protect us from ourselves.
Although it was stupid,
we thought we had to follow the steps,
follow protocol,
take it slow, take it easy.
We wanted to scream, we wanted to smile,
but we never did.
And we missed out on so much —
Today I would tell you to go for it –
Take the chance –
what’s the worse that could happen?
You’ve been there, so you know.
How about if it didn’t go that way,
and instead, your chance paid off,
and your day was filled with smiles
and happiness,
instead of tears and regret?
But because that wasn’t how things were done,
you never found out.
That was so sad, wasn’t it?
All along the paths we walked
there were all these “what if’s”
that we will never have the right answer for…
too many pages without an ending.
Too many smiles never shared,
too many kisses never shared,
too many worries that got in the way
and kept us from moving from the grays
and into the bright and shining colors
where we should have been.
But things were not done like that then.
So we put those records on the player,
and we lapped up the sad lyrics and the sad music,
and we went on home,
alone,
because that was the way it was.
We hated it, but we didn’t try to change it,
and we were the only ones who could have changed anything.
Do you remember all of that?
I do.

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