My Day, My Fight by Shan

Wake up in the morning to a house reeking of weed
Put my first cigarette out between a stem and a seed
I look up at my mother, no responce, just a stoned stare
I try to convince myself that she really does care
My mom is very sick with stomach problems and depression
It seems like she's trying to make herself worse with her smoking sessions
I finish getting ready for work and head to the store
This is the place I love the most, this is where I shine, I soar
I stay busy from 8 til 6, looking up car parts and selling oil
I leave there to head back home, just that thought alone makes my head boil
Kick the door open, walking into the same old musty place
My mother is right where she was this morning, the house is a disgrace
I make sure my little sister is ok, clean for a bit, and reach for something to eat
Theres nothing in the cabinets or fridge again, I can't take this no more, I'm beat
My stepfather comes home, plays with my sister and sends her off to bed
He lights up a joint and smokes with my mom, Damn, have they heard anything I've said?
I make my way upstairs to my room, I can't take the smell, the insanity, I can't stand the sight
I close my eyes and try to forget this mess, believe me I'd do something, but I'm to tired to fight
I chill out for a while, usually drawing or writing, maybe talking to a friend or two
But usually I'm trying to figure out what the hell I'm going to do
I can't stand to see my mother looking so sick, can't stand my other sister not coming home
She's rebelling, she's scared, she hates to be here as much as I do, we both feel alone
I can't stand my stepfather, and how he dismisses seeing anything wrong in this hole
Everything is fine in his mind, until he's wronged by someone, only THEN does he take control
The drugs, the abandonment, the aching, the pain, It's all got to stop somewhere right?
I think that if I keep believing, keep trying my best with this, it will come true, if I just continue to fight

Marci (unknown) -- Tuesday, August 19 2003, 03:39 pm

WOW
What an excellent piece of writing! From the moment I starting reading the first line I was able to picture this in my mind. I hope that this isn't really happening to you, but if it is I hope that it will get better. You have a great ability to write, keep it up :o)

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