When Do We Become Ourselves
23 May, 2004
Author: Pamela O'Brien
When does being alone become something that you seek
Instead of something that you seek to change?
A moment, where clarity
Overules desire
And forces you to get to know yourself
Before giving yourself away
When does sorrow become an emotional rescue
Instead of a way of living?
The realization that to pursue that which may not exist
Could prove worthy of time & effort
And all of the ideals that it conveys
When does making a choice become changing a life?
Instead of living a life by choices
Which harbour indecision
And regret
Feeding the self-doubt of being alone......
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Comments on this poem/writing:
| Martin Vann (4.244.87.211) -- Monday, May 24 2004, 01:58 pm Pam, This is very good question, and my answer is simple. When do we become ourselves? My thought is, we become ourselves, when there is no one else, we have to be. Enjoyed this intriguing poem. MartinV |
| Pamela (66.38.146.126) -- Monday, May 24 2004, 07:22 pm I am not surprised in the least that you read this poem and chose to answer it Martin! I knew it was a subject that you would tackle because it is intriguing, as are you. I love your simple answer, however, I wrote this poem because I am faced with these questions on my journey of finding myself. I think they are important and relevant to the development of who we are. To know the answers to these questions - is to know oneself. Wow, philosophical answer or what?!?! Thanks for commenting Martin, I trusted that you would! |
| Martin Vann (4.244.87.211) -- Monday, May 24 2004, 08:53 pm Pamela, My answer to your question, was my first thought, I didn't play with it. However, when we take a journey, as you seem to under take, there are NO answers to be found from someone else. The truth is, if, you are on this journey, by yourself, you will find the shadows that drove you to find an answer, and the truth if, it exist, will come from yourself, question is, can you find it, and if, you do, this is what I want to know..., what will one do, when they find the answers that are true to one's self, I'm still searching for my mine, tell us all, if, you find yours, but I think, you will find, you are somewhere between yourself, all your dreams and reality. Not kidding with you Pam, this is a heart wrentching search, turning hate and love out of our self, so we can see, it laying before us, you have more courage than me. I lay my pen down, in respect of your quest. No pressure here, right, you brought it to us, now, tell us what you find, even if, it be nothing at all. You say, you trust me, I/we trust you, never challenge poets when you search for the truth, we all want to know. Only a woman, could seek the challenge that you do! You set me up, didn't you, you know the way I think. No, I don't toy with you, and I can not give you more, than the answer I have shared. I'm not afraid of you, but tell you what, I'll be careful, of what I say to you. Now, on your way, maiden, tell us what you find out, about yourself. With Respect, GREAT RESPECT! MartinV P.S. I know dreamer, would be proud of you, to search for the answer, millions of us can not find, as I say, no pressure here, just a reply, to your heart felt lines. MartinV Withe Respect |
| Pamela (66.38.146.126) -- Monday, May 24 2004, 09:57 pm Martin, what a response! Thank you for not only taking the time to actually contemplate the questions I have presented, but for giving me an opportunity to try and answer them as well. I cannot speak for everyone else, because these questions are answered differently for every person, hence why they are what define us in the end. In the first paragraph, I am referring to love. I had an epiphany lately that helped me to understand why I have been so unhappy in relationships. And that is, simply put, because I do not know who I TRULY am yet. There are certain aspects of myself that I accept and acknowledge, and principles that I hold firm too. But until I actually know myself as well as I think able, I am not going to be able to give that "whole" person to somebody else. It is a facade. It can't be done (for me). Because that other person will never really have me if I don't have grasp of myself first. However, to some people the first paragraph could represent other details of their lives - and therefore the answer would vary extremely I'm sure. The second paragraph speaks volumes when it is applied to my personal life. For me (and I will try to keep this shorter than the first breakdown) it focuses on two of my characterstics which struggle on a daily basis; I am ambitious & I am easily satisfied. I have dreams, goals and standards - but I am not picky or hard to please/impress. While these are not particularily bad traits, they do make life interesting sometimes :O) For the reason that I often settle for less than I should, and I often pursue that which I cannot have. And last, but not least........the last paragraph. Which is the toughest one to describe in words, as to how it plays a role in my life. To often have I had to make difficult decisions that could have been prevented if I would have done something differently. If I lived my life differently. Situations that my life style has put me into and has forced me to make a choice between several options that offer no solution. So in my moment of clarity while writing this poem, it became obvious to me that while choices cannot be avoided completely, they can be positive & controlled. And in order to do that, I must make the choice to change my life and myself for the better. This is only what I have for answers now, there perhaps is more to tell and perhaps the answers are not final......but I won't begin to question that too or we'll be here for a decade! I hope that you have even managed to read all of this, I do enjoy that somebody has some interest in this highly philosophical poem of mine. And Martin, if you care to do so, feel free to write to us about how these questions apply to YOUR life. |
| Martin Vann (4.244.87.211) -- Monday, May 24 2004, 11:24 pm Pam, My life is very simple, love gravy on biscuits, bacon is a plus, but, not a must. Love to see snow flakes, as they drift down. Love to hear a good song, on the radio, or just a hello-where have you been for so long. Someone who remembers me, doesn't matter if they hear my song on the radio. Just the touch, of someone's heart. I love to feel, but don't need to touch, someone, who remembers me, if, only becasue, I bought a loaf of bread. No rock star ever had it this good. The man, who delivers my mail, saying, good morning Martin, not just sir, he is among those, that give joy to my heart, I love to hear my name, when it is spoken by someone else, even if, I don't know their name. They are kind enough to say my name, because, a computer told them so. Point is, it doesn't take much, to make me feel, like I exist, just a simple hi, Martin, that is all I need, and it tells me, who I am.........,Alive. If, I feel, I exist, I push no farther, yet, when it comes to love of someone else, there is a change, now I demand certain things, whereas, it didin't matter before. No, I'm not crazy, just strangers who know my name, display courtesy, well, hell, that will do for me. MartinV P.S. Who is US, I'm replying to Pam. MartinV |
| Pamela (66.38.146.126) -- Tuesday, May 25 2004, 05:22 am I was implicating the entire website, in the event that someone else should be partaking in this conversation at some point & time. Our words of wisdom could be of use to others too :0) As for your name and how stealthily it represents who you are, I am impressed. If I could be so happy with the littler things such as bacon on pancakes or a mailman greeting! You are blessed to have the ability to appreciate these things with no inhibitions. But as the poem indicates, I have much to learn and a far journey ahead, which perhaps will end in some gravy covered pancakes and a very large smile. |
| bored (206.191.91.170) -- Wednesday, May 26 2004, 12:36 am oh get a room you two. |
| Martin Vann (4.244.96.112) -- Wednesday, May 26 2004, 06:38 pm Bored, Yes, you are correct, sorry, just got carried away, and thought your comment was actually, polite. |
| Pamela (66.225.130.57) -- Wednesday, May 26 2004, 09:22 pm It's true |
| bored (209.112.22.22) -- Thursday, May 27 2004, 12:19 am Iit's easy for us to get carried away. |
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